When it comes to art I have learned that you could spend a dozen hours working on something and not make any progress at all, and the next day you could complete it start to finish flawlessly within a few minutes.Then every time I tell myself that I have not the time, when I actually have it, a lot of it perhaps. But I often seem to decide not to art because I just don't feel like it. Then when I do feel like it, I could fail miserably for hours on end. Other days I waste valuable art time just writing stupid journals.In fact, most of my best deviations statistically speaking, were created when I didn't have time nor intention at all, but I just made them. I have no idea why or how, but they just happened there and then. The same way I could plan a picture for days, weeks or even months, and to this day not be able to finish them, even after a few hundred hours of work.Inspiration is a bitch like that.
Is it a good thing that I stopped counting the days? What day is it even now... Day 945? That's only 944 days after I first thought of quitting
, and then every thursday or so after that.
All that time since I started, and I still suck! Oh well...
Want some case studies?
Charging. Improvised in a few hours during an afternoon for the training grounds. I looked at the daily prompt. I said, "Okay, this prompt is SHIT, I can't even work with it, so I'll just do the most generic crap I can think of just for completion sake". And when I had my generic piece of crap, I was so ashamed of myself I just went there and said "This sucks so much, perhaps the least I could do is spice it up with some little silly animations". Then it chilled there in my gallery for months, and just when I thought I've had it... a fateful day someone decided to turn it into a GIF, and just like that it took the internet by storm. I don't even know!
The Conquering of Love. This lil' sucker who was... or is... or maybe was, but still is? my learning project as I dived into the world of comics for the first time. Oh I remember it clearly, production started one evening the 13th of February, 2013. Sketches were made, pages completed, pages discarded, sketches redrawn, research done, books read, scenes reimagined, scripts rewritten, styles switched, work files lost, breaks taken, pages reinvented. Then over a year later, we actually managed to publish the first page. Each page easily took over a hundred hours each, no kidding. Yep, I'm that bad at comics. Oh I was thrilled when
the next week I noticed that it was being translated into other languages and even that wasn't enough fuel for it to come easier. Comics are hard to make! Or at least for me anyways.
So when the lazy and uninspired work outperforms the meticulously planned and passionately crafted art piece by a tenfold, it is really easy to get frustrated. But, if it's so statistically incorrect, if it's crazy... why to this day I insist in such art form that I can't even properly perform in the first place? It can only be but pure masochistic insanity.
Now there's that fifth season of the horse show. Eh, I've never been truly excited for anything about it, but it always seems to inspire me in the strangest of ways. We'll see I guess...